Stalking about campus with a Rifle...

I am not about to do it. I have far too much restraint and self control to go all Marc LePine on you guys. But here's an insight as to why that shit happens:

Administration / Bureaucracy

Now this is a rant, so if you've had a bad enough day and only want positive influi, then stop reading now. Months and months ago I applied for the Autumn convocation. At the time I asked "is there anything else I should know or do to make sure there are no snags?" The reassuring reply: "No, no. They would contact you to let you know if there is anything." So far so hoopy.

A couple months pass, I hear nothing. Being both shady and suspicious myself, I decide to make double sure. "Any problems at all?" I ask. "It's all good," the reassuring response. I felt better. Now, any reasonable person would leave it at that, comfortable in knowing everything is just so. I, as I stated earlier in different words, am hardly so reasonable. This is a condition instilled in large part by the fact that I have worked intimately with the bureaucracy of Laurentian University, viewing firsthand the inefficiency, ineptness, and general devil may care attitudes that have become so entrenched. The upshot: I went back twice more to check everything is going well and there are no blips on the radar. O faithful reader, you can likely guess that I was told "there are no blips on the radar at all." If you do the math, you will see that I had Four separate, individual assurances.

In the meantime, my poor immigrant parents, who got off the boat in search of a better life in the new lands are dying to see their son graduate, for this symbolizes the aspirations attainable in the land of promise and plenty. Mither writes often to find out any news about it. The poor dear.

Today, Sept. 27, Y.T. gets a letter from L.U. from which I quote:
"The Senate Committee on Academic Regulations and Award has reviewed your application for the Fall 2006 Convocation. According to our records, you will not be eligible to graduate as you will not have completed all of the program requirements."

I was fulminating! For the sake of you proper ladies and gentlemen readers, I will except the stream of invective that flowed from my mouth for the next half hour. Into L.U.'s admin I go, approaching critical mass. It seems I have a fail mark in RLST 3196 and I don't have the course COST 3006. Two problems right? - Wrong!

For three years I have pointed out the faults of the school in cross-referencing courses, in their lack of courses (the reason I am not in a Master's Program right now!), in their inability to give proper information on any of these topics. Have they ever once listened? Apparently not! You see. RLST 3196 ACTUALLY IS COST 3006! They Are the Same Freakin' Course! Not that administration can comprehend this, though it is their creation to begin with. Eventually this becomes understood and to give credit where due, Colette Rainville at the Registrar's Office took care of that lickety split. Like, on the spot as I watched, as fast as ever any problem was solved in that office. Thank you, Colette, you are wonderful!

Now the problem of a "Fail" still stood out. Here's the story on that. I took the course RLST 3196, and I kicked it's ass. For the most part, I kicked it's ass. You see, I failed to hand in one essay. I believe it was worth 25%. I had calculated my marks though and without the essay, I still had a definite pass (in fact a B if I remember correctly). A "B," without the essay! Instead of simply giving my lower mark, the prof decided to give me an incomplete. This dragged out for a while, in fact all last year. The incomplete cocooned on my transcript and eventually emerged as a beautiful jewel-winged "Fail." I spoke to the prof. She said "just gimme an essay." I thought "just gimme a lower damned grade."

Whatever! I gave a shortened essay early in the summer this year. I still have a Fail. I cannot reach the prof. She is not available. There are no office hours for her posted. The secretary has no clue when the prof is around. I can say from experience that the prof does not spend much time at the University outside of her classes. Classes, I might add, that were fun, interesting and stimulating. I would recommend them if not for the bullshit I am wading through right now. -Don't let it happen to you!

So I ask the secretary "when is her next class?"
Secretary: "Well, she doesn't have anything tomorrow..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
etc. for fully a minute and a half, when I finally realize she is not going to say anything else. "I Suppose the next day is Friday then," I impose on her, "Does she teach anything Friday?.."
"Oh, let's see..."
(fucking obstinate dullard).
So there it is, I go in Friday morning and I will either come out graduating or with somebody's face in my hands, to be fashioned into a grisly mask later on.

I suppose that if I weren't letting my emotions out so strongly, one might pity me. You all should have the good sense to fear this happening to you, as you likely know about this administration first hand. I Almost have an Aristotelian tragedy on my hands. (^_^).

Friday. If I'm smiling, say hallo. If my jaw muscles appear tensed and my eyes dart around a lot, stay the hell away from me!