The World Cup, or "C" = death!

I wrote this for someone dear who wanted to watch the cup with me. Circumstance and distance intervenes on that front, but I can still talk Turkey! If not this cup, then the next one.

In a few short weeks this site will be overrun by footie. Anyone even vaguely close to me has heard it mentioned plenty now. The commercials are trickling through the television channels, but soon it will be a media flood. Why? Because simply put, the World Cup is the single largest international event. It is The tournament. It is The definitive competition of the World.
So here I am offering the reader my assessment of how the first round will go. For those who have no idea of the setup, there are eight groups of four teams, within the groups there are playdowns to see who will progress to the next round. Keep in mind this is informed guesswork. Some of it Should be wrong, if only for statistical purposes. Of course Vegas bookies and professional commentators screw up too, so no apologies. Here we go:

Group A: This consists of Germany, Costa Rica, Poland and Ecuador. I like this group and hesitate to call it quickly. Many will say that clearly Germany will go through. Well that wouldn't surprise anyone at all. I don't know about their keeper, Kahn. Apology to an anonymous friend who liked Kahn very much, but he's older now, I'd like to see new blood. It's not that I Dislike Kahn, he's a solid keeper, but frankly he wasn't Aaaaalllll that. Alright, I will concede Germany going through, but I am going to say they go with some losses. It's funny, some people call the German style boring. I suppose I can see why, but there is a mechanism to it, method. When the machine is tuned it can really shine, and I can appreciate that.
I honestly don't know who of the other three are going to progress because I didn't do my homework. I am thinking Ecuador, but have no basis. That makes things shorter eh? I was thinking that if I cannot be in Germany, then it would be good to be in Poland, where many of the world's most beautiful women will need some serious consoling in the event their team is out.
But! Poland may yet go through with Germany. I cannot speak for Costa Rica. It's Poland or Ecuador and I like them both. In fact if Germany were knocked out and Poland and Ecuador progressed that would be a thing!

Group B: This consists of England, Paraguay, Trinidad & Tobago and Sweden. Ah Hell, the hard stuff first! What I am thinking (and there is definite emotional bias here), is that Sweden will go through. I say this without knowing how they've been recently. The second position will be a struggle between England and Paraguay. Frankly I would like to see Paraguay go through, and god knows England has made some pre-emptive noise about players they cannot field. That is to say, their excuse for any losses is pre-established PR. That sounds vindictive, but I've met Real British soccer fans, crazed and kicked off the continent soccer fans. Of course South Korea is in this cup again and y'know what they say, Tommy, "it comes in threes..."
I think this will be a pretty close group, excepting Trinidad & Tobago. By all means if T&T can put the boots to any of these teams, kudos to them. I cannot think of any time I have seen that team play, so no idea what to expect.

Group C: I am thinking this is the Real group of Death. Argentina, Côte d'Ivoire, Serbia & Montenegro, Netherlands. History says that the first and last of these will make the next round. Of all the groups, it seems to me that there is more potential for upsets here than anywhere else. In the last decade I have developed a taste for African football. It isn't my favourite, but we all have to agree it is developing well, it is increasingly effective and it is fun to watch. I have no particular feelings about Argentina or Serbia & Montenegro either way. One is a giant, the other a potential giant slayer. All I ask is some interesting matches. I have a fondness for Netherlands and even more so for Côte d'Ivoire as they are new-ish and kind of underdog-ish. I am sure this group will provide some serious excitement and hopefully some interesting surprises.

Group D: Mexico, Iran, Angola, Portugal. Iran, eh? I am glad that the Yanks aren't in the same group. Sorry, Iran, you seem like the valiant effort, but ultimately feckless character. If I am wrong I will literally print this sentence and eat it. Further if I am wrong, then good on ya and congratulations. But it won't happen. Who shall take a commanding run through this group? mmmmmMexico! That's right. I like Mexico. I am pulling for them straight off, told you this was biased! They have some of the world's top footballers at the moment, they are in good form, they are plain cool.
Portugal I also like and I expect them to come through second. Now Angola may or may not be a contender and it's good either way. It sucks to watch no-challenge soccer. Every fan wants to think "their team" really earned their progression, so having stated I prefer Portugal and Mexico, good luck to you Angola, I am eager to see what you will make of yourselves.

Group E: Italy (Eeeeeeeeta-lee), Ghana, USA and Czech Republic. I had heard that Italy was actually crying that once again, they are caught in the group of death, though I haven't verified the report. Eh! Relaxxi! I foresee Italy going through, even if it isn't smooth as glass. A single loss in the opening round seems to shake each of my friends who are rooting for Italy. A thought on Italian style: Get out there, score, lock down the field with ironclad defense. Yes, it can be right fuckin' boring at times, watching the Azzuri. On the other hand, it is a thing to see when a team is under fire, to be able to defend wave after wave of furious onslaught. I am thinking of a specific game I watched with the Italians once, where they were getting from all sides and only let one goal in. Other teams would have been scored on four or five times. Impressive.
Ghana. Hi Ghana! How've you been? K, well there's refreshments here and dinner will be on shortly, go ahead and mingle.
I expect the Czech Republic to go through to the following round. In fact, I expect them to go through more definitively than Italy. Given their rank, their history, their secret weather control machine to be used for world domination... The Czechs are always fun to watch, and I like them. It's not Extra-special like or anything, but you have to appreciate high talent.
I am counting on America to introduce the element of surprise here. Didja get that America? I am counting on you for something. If you don't deliver that's fine, but if you do deliver please fail to think I owe you anything. I believe it's possible, it's certainly happened before and so a bit of mix up could certainly provide a modicum of thrill and pleasure from the Yanks.

Group F: "F" for "Favourite" ya think? Damn straight, because this group has the team I think of as "my team." Hey, mock me if you will, but remember that a lot of you are Toronto Maple Leafs fans... (buuurrrrrrrrn). Brazil. Croatia. Australia and Japan. I always acknowledge the chance of an upset, which is exactly what it will be called if Australia or Japan (or Both!) go to the second round. I like Japan, I have nothing at all against Aus, but we all know...
Brazil. This is my team. I would love to share them with you, by all means may Brazil be Your team. I have been a fan of Brazil for a long time. Longer than some of you have been alive in fact. For those of you who are familiar with the epithet of "The Beautiful Game" which is now applied to soccer in all it's glorious manifestations; it came from the development of a Brazilian style of play. Remember? I spoke about German and Italian styles? In the 70s a dutch guy created a style called "total footbal." The Brazilian style of "The Beautiful Game" emphasizes skill, flair and panache in play. It makes art of the game. When watching the Beautiful Game you see the Love of the Game more clearly than anywhere else. Brazil!
There is another side here. Yes, Brazil Should have had the cup in France, let's not raise the dead again. What I want to express is that the attitude and feeling behind this team is more important to me than being the best in the world. I would indeed be stunned and sad if they did not progress. That said, I expect them to, though I would bet they do Not win the cup. Perhaps I am not a good fan, but I am perfectly okay with a number of other teams taking the cup this year. (It would be nice if they had to fight Brazil for it).
Croatia is an unusual nation for this tournament. When they are "On" they are unstoppable and can go toe to toe with Anyone. Anyone, even with My team. The problem is the difficulty in determining when they will go Off. They can power along and very suddenly they will lose steam and that very fast. Nonetheless, when they are On they give some of the most watchable plays around. I like the team because of this. They have heart and I wish them well.

Group G: France, Switzerland, Korea Republic and Togo. Many of you will be pointing out that it should be South Korea... gotcha. Um, France is a threat that I don't care for. What can I tell you? I don't hate them, though Bartez certainly looks suspiciously like Moby, I just don't have anything For them. Nope, I like the Swiss and the Koreans. I would like to see those two go through. Togo, I know nothing of you. I am ignorant, but I do like surprises.

Group H: Spain, Ukraine, Tunisia, Saudi Arabia. I expect Spain to progress as they usually do. I like Spain a fair bit actually. Saudi is likely in my mind to get nowhere. Fast. Weren't they the ones that got hammered 10-0 in a recent cup? Not sure, Harsh. So Ukraine and Tunisia. Well I have already said that I like the African nations generally, but this time I have an emotional investment. Ukraine, according to my sources has performed admirably leading up to this competition. Spain, Ukraine - right Pip?